Sunday, September 18, 2016
Dysfunction=Junction
I would like to keep this blog writing short … and to the point.
I don't know. I can sure try. But there is so much to say.
I have seen this scenario play out more times than I wish to enumerate. Whole families have fallen into this one huge rut . . . DYSFUNCTION. The biggest downfall of it all, is that usually, the family members don't/can't see it. They are too busy conducting their affairs, their "family life", too busy with the cares of this world, jobs, etc. The problem lies, of course, in THE MIND. It is a host of mind=sets, attitudes and very bad habits. I have come to believe that in most cases, dysfunction is generational, i.e. genetic. As in "blood-line curses". Yeah. Just like that. I said it.
CURSINGS AND WORDS A=FLYING
Let's start out with the greatest tell-tale sign:
Curses. As in "word cursings". This usually starts with the parents, who are just following suit the way that they were trained, saying stuff over their kids like, "You're so stupid. You can't do anything right. You won't amount to anything. You'll probably end up in jail before you're 18." And ETC. It gets worse. Siblings start in, saying all manner of evil and dark and negative things over each other, not thinking a thing of it, as if it's just OKAY. Later in life, when approached about this behavior, many times they justify it by saying, "We were only kidding, poking fun … why, can't you take a joke??"
SHEEEEESH.
Anybody want to exit this family now??
MEMBERS JUST AIN'T THERE FOR YA
Maybe you come from this type of family. Maybe you have gone through some kind of crisis, a real hard one, and your family's reaction? "Man I can't believe you let that happen to you … I can't believe you let that person into your life … If it was me, that would have never happened to me … What? You expect me to sympathize and coddle you? Suck it up, baby!" That's just an example. Some of you have heard much worse. You have become the "family scape-goat", and you get blamed for ALL.
It doesn't matter what happens to anyone else … especially if you are the "lone christian" in the family. "Just sit over there in the corner and DON'T TALK … we don't want to hear from you!" Now Jesus said that he didn't come to bring peace but a sword … but he was talking about HIMSELF being the main burning & dividing ISSUE of Life. Jesus doesn't have to bring a sword to these families, they have already fashioned their own!
"Why, do you think you are better than us??? Are you a holier-than-thou person??? Why do you have to be so DIFFERENT???" And if you are a TRUE BELIEVER, just trying to reach out to your family with the real love of God, well, watch out. In a dysfunctional family, this truth rings true more than anywhere else:
"A prophet is not welcome in his home town."
They just aren't listening.
So, don't plan on going through any personal crises, because even though they may "act" like they care, they won't. They won't be there for you.
WHERE IS THE LOVE?
Paul the Apostle warned that some would fall away from the faith, and some would let their love "grow cold". So, if you see a hardened heart, and try to appeal to them to "soften up", good luck. The only way that is going to happen is if they have a
Damascus Road=type experience and Jesus bursts through their darkness and stubborn minds. It could happen. You could pray for it. But don't hold your breath, know when to pack-up and dust your feet off. The Lord has plenty of others in this world for you to reach, and you shouldn't spend your whole entire life going back & forth to family, just to repeatedly get your daily dose of light-socket treatment. One can only take so much "shocking". Trust me on this. You can learn to love from a distance … and God didn't call you to pain and strife and suffering. No he didn't.
DYSFUNCTION=JUNCTION, WHAT'S YOUR FUNCTION??
The "function" of dysfunction is to set everything in a family at odds with itself, for things to get twisted and not operate according to God's design. Some people have it all topsy-turvy, and for them it's "normal". If you don't like it, then "tough!"
When you are a part of something dark like this, for so long, after a while you'll start to wonder if you slipped into The Munsters or The Addams Family!
Unfortunately, we see dysfunction in many other settings … on the job in companies, in government etc. Dating relationships.
Marriages. A man at the local Circle K yelling at his daughter while she is trying to decide which drink she wants from the fountain. A parent berating a child, who has long grown up, and has "gone his/her own way" and that same parent ridiculing that child/grown-up in public, in their presence or behind their back. The major dynamic in dysfunctional families is the role-playing of the diplomat, the aloof Dad, the overbearing mother, the "parenting sister" and the family "secret" or the family scape=goat. There are other scenarios, this is just one example. What is the end goal?? That this plays out everyday of the year, for years, until it is passed down as the "family way" or tradition, and the whole thing just starts over again … unless someone rises up and BREAKS THE CHAINS.
THEY GOT TO PUT AWAY THE MASKS!
In order for this madness to stop, to change, those who are "responsible" must wake up and take off the masks. Stop pretending that everything is normal or okay. It's not. Someone is going to get hurt, and chances are, it is too late. They are already VERY HURT. If they love Jesus, then they can get help, they can get therapy.
But what about you???
Are you causing someone pain?
Do you act like a "weapon" because you were "trained" that way? True families are supposed to be there for each other, to share the load, to cry together, rejoice together and cheer each other on. Get rid of your stupid jealousy and hate. Stop pretending that you have such a great family, you've got the whole public fooled, but it all falls apart the next day you get back home. Take off the dark shades, take off the masks and get real … get the Love of God in your hearts. Stop persecuting your own flesh and blood … get behind them, and support their successes, or their attempts at that. Act like you care … and really do care!! Do something to show your love, and not just a bunch of words. Words mean nothing if they are not backed up with real genuine "I feel ya" LOVE. Love is often an ACTION VERB, that manifests itself in awesome life-changing ways.
The MIRROR is pointing at YOU … take a good long stare at it,
and make a change in your life. For the good of someone you should love.
Sunday, September 4, 2016
The Heart of CAIN
This blog topic is different … different than I usually write.
That's may sound peculiar as I am always writing things that could be construed as "different", as far as point of view goes. I have been dubbed "The Radical Pastor" for years, since about 2011. My blogs represent the fact that I approach topics and spiritual things with the finesse of "radical view", simply because I'm all about exposing LIES and spongy thinking regarding doctrines, etc.
So, I'm in the OT tonight. Don't usually spend a lot of time there, except for maybe Proverbs and Psalms and The Prophets. Then there's the whole "character-study" thing, where we take someone's life (like Abraham, King Saul or David, e.g.) and dissect that under a microscope.
I believe that most everyone is familiar with the story of CAIN.
He was a son of Adam & Eve … and he had a brother ABEL. Cain was jealous of his brother, his relationship with God, the favor on his life so . . . he killed him.
Now every Bible teacher out there has preached on Cain's sin. But I have only heard a few sermons on "the spirit of Cain". And I'm taking that a little further by talking about The Heart of Cain.
The Heart of Cain is selfish. It is rebellious towards God Almighty. It gets jealous. It likes being "religious" because it thinks that's what makes one "look good". The Heart of Cain really has the "warm-water-spirit" that we have wrote about. That "lukewarm" thing that is actually quite PHONY. Oh sure it acts all pious and "good" and covers its deeds with "good works" . . . and engages in "sacrifices" to absolve itself from guilt and escape conviction. It may act like it's FOR YOU, but in reality is truly against you. It is the "Benedict Arnold" spirit, through and through. Yes, it will betray you, when you least expect it. The Apostle Paul wrote about "false brethren" -- well, there you go. Need I illustrate anymore?
> And the Lord had regard for Abel and for his offering; but for Cain and for his offering He had no regard. So Cain became very angry and his countenance fell. Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will not your countenance be lifted up? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door; and its desire is for you, but you must master it.” Cain told Abel his brother. And it came about when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” And he said, “I do not know. Am I my brother’s keeper?” He said, “What have you done? The voice of your brother’s blood is crying to Me from the ground. Now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother’s blood from your hand. When you cultivate the ground, it will no longer yield its strength to you; you will be a vagrant and a wanderer on the earth.” Cain said to the Lord, “My punishment is too great to bear! Behold, You have driven me this day from the face of the ground; and from Your face I will be hidden, and I will be a vagrant and a wanderer on the earth, and whoever finds me will kill me.” So the Lord said to him, “Therefore whoever kills Cain, vengeance will be taken on him sevenfold.” And the Lord appointed a sign for Cain, so that no one finding him would slay him. (Genesis ch. 4)
From the narrative we can see just how flippant Cain's attitude was, toward his brother, and toward God. As we read this, we can tell that Cain never really "repented" of his deed (godly sorrow), but God Almighty dealt with Cain where he was at. He even strongly urged Cain to RESIST sin … God knew what he was going to do, of course. And that was the first time that murder came on the scene.
> For this is the message which you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another; not as Cain, who was of the evil one and slew his brother. And for what reason did he slay him? Because his deeds were evil, and his brother’s were righteous.
(I John 3:11,12)
I have spent a lot of time in this little epistle, I John. It is beautiful and simple, even though the truths contained within are profound and strong. We see verses like, "By this we may know …" and "If you say you love God, but hate your brother, how can the love of God be in you?" And so, with the Heart of Cain. His heart was evil. He hated his brother.
I have been around many so-called "christians" who were nothing more than the devil's "plants", pretending to be saved, pretending to be on my side, but they were the ones who were ready to stab me in the back, when I turned around. Maybe they didn't like my words … maybe they didn't like my "walk" … or maybe I ended up exposing them, because sometimes, that's what I do, whether I know it or not. Beware. True Blue Believers have "got your back", and won't use your info as a gossip tool to undermine you. This is particularly difficult to deal with if it is a "family member" who turns out this way. It is in our God-given redeemed nature to love them regardless. But "false brethren" cannot receive the love of God, and no matter how hard you try, sometimes, you won't break through their defenses. You have to cover yourself. You have to be on your guard. And in some cases, you may have to walk away, and be rid of the "poison" that some people bring. Some people are just plain TOXIC, and God Almighty never called you to taking in poison, nor did he call you to strife.
I first was made aware of "false brethren" and warm-water-spirit folk by reading Proverbs. Actually, I was commanded by The Spirit of God to study Proverbs, because of the people I was going to be dealing with. I had no idea how much pride and folly they were into. And … That word … those WORDS from Proverbs saved my life, and saved the day on numerous occasions. You might say that the wisdom from that book just "kicked in".
Finally, the heart of Cain has no real concern for the Family of God. No concern for community. No grasp or appreciation of The Kingdom of God, nor for The People of God. It is only focused and geared toward SELF. If it has to defiantly rise above and step on all the rest, that is what it will do. The heart is murderous … i.e. with WORDS and evil thoughts and scheming against those in its sphere, those in its path.
I could write much more on this topic, but for now, that's all I got to say. I hope and trust that you will study the places I mentioned, read the Apostle Paul's life, and Proverbs, so that you too may be prepared, and not deceived.
GOD BLESS YOU.
That's may sound peculiar as I am always writing things that could be construed as "different", as far as point of view goes. I have been dubbed "The Radical Pastor" for years, since about 2011. My blogs represent the fact that I approach topics and spiritual things with the finesse of "radical view", simply because I'm all about exposing LIES and spongy thinking regarding doctrines, etc.
So, I'm in the OT tonight. Don't usually spend a lot of time there, except for maybe Proverbs and Psalms and The Prophets. Then there's the whole "character-study" thing, where we take someone's life (like Abraham, King Saul or David, e.g.) and dissect that under a microscope.
I believe that most everyone is familiar with the story of CAIN.
He was a son of Adam & Eve … and he had a brother ABEL. Cain was jealous of his brother, his relationship with God, the favor on his life so . . . he killed him.
Now every Bible teacher out there has preached on Cain's sin. But I have only heard a few sermons on "the spirit of Cain". And I'm taking that a little further by talking about The Heart of Cain.
The Heart of Cain is selfish. It is rebellious towards God Almighty. It gets jealous. It likes being "religious" because it thinks that's what makes one "look good". The Heart of Cain really has the "warm-water-spirit" that we have wrote about. That "lukewarm" thing that is actually quite PHONY. Oh sure it acts all pious and "good" and covers its deeds with "good works" . . . and engages in "sacrifices" to absolve itself from guilt and escape conviction. It may act like it's FOR YOU, but in reality is truly against you. It is the "Benedict Arnold" spirit, through and through. Yes, it will betray you, when you least expect it. The Apostle Paul wrote about "false brethren" -- well, there you go. Need I illustrate anymore?
> And the Lord had regard for Abel and for his offering; but for Cain and for his offering He had no regard. So Cain became very angry and his countenance fell. Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will not your countenance be lifted up? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door; and its desire is for you, but you must master it.” Cain told Abel his brother. And it came about when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” And he said, “I do not know. Am I my brother’s keeper?” He said, “What have you done? The voice of your brother’s blood is crying to Me from the ground. Now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother’s blood from your hand. When you cultivate the ground, it will no longer yield its strength to you; you will be a vagrant and a wanderer on the earth.” Cain said to the Lord, “My punishment is too great to bear! Behold, You have driven me this day from the face of the ground; and from Your face I will be hidden, and I will be a vagrant and a wanderer on the earth, and whoever finds me will kill me.” So the Lord said to him, “Therefore whoever kills Cain, vengeance will be taken on him sevenfold.” And the Lord appointed a sign for Cain, so that no one finding him would slay him. (Genesis ch. 4)
From the narrative we can see just how flippant Cain's attitude was, toward his brother, and toward God. As we read this, we can tell that Cain never really "repented" of his deed (godly sorrow), but God Almighty dealt with Cain where he was at. He even strongly urged Cain to RESIST sin … God knew what he was going to do, of course. And that was the first time that murder came on the scene.
> For this is the message which you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another; not as Cain, who was of the evil one and slew his brother. And for what reason did he slay him? Because his deeds were evil, and his brother’s were righteous.
(I John 3:11,12)
I have spent a lot of time in this little epistle, I John. It is beautiful and simple, even though the truths contained within are profound and strong. We see verses like, "By this we may know …" and "If you say you love God, but hate your brother, how can the love of God be in you?" And so, with the Heart of Cain. His heart was evil. He hated his brother.
I have been around many so-called "christians" who were nothing more than the devil's "plants", pretending to be saved, pretending to be on my side, but they were the ones who were ready to stab me in the back, when I turned around. Maybe they didn't like my words … maybe they didn't like my "walk" … or maybe I ended up exposing them, because sometimes, that's what I do, whether I know it or not. Beware. True Blue Believers have "got your back", and won't use your info as a gossip tool to undermine you. This is particularly difficult to deal with if it is a "family member" who turns out this way. It is in our God-given redeemed nature to love them regardless. But "false brethren" cannot receive the love of God, and no matter how hard you try, sometimes, you won't break through their defenses. You have to cover yourself. You have to be on your guard. And in some cases, you may have to walk away, and be rid of the "poison" that some people bring. Some people are just plain TOXIC, and God Almighty never called you to taking in poison, nor did he call you to strife.
I first was made aware of "false brethren" and warm-water-spirit folk by reading Proverbs. Actually, I was commanded by The Spirit of God to study Proverbs, because of the people I was going to be dealing with. I had no idea how much pride and folly they were into. And … That word … those WORDS from Proverbs saved my life, and saved the day on numerous occasions. You might say that the wisdom from that book just "kicked in".
Finally, the heart of Cain has no real concern for the Family of God. No concern for community. No grasp or appreciation of The Kingdom of God, nor for The People of God. It is only focused and geared toward SELF. If it has to defiantly rise above and step on all the rest, that is what it will do. The heart is murderous … i.e. with WORDS and evil thoughts and scheming against those in its sphere, those in its path.
I could write much more on this topic, but for now, that's all I got to say. I hope and trust that you will study the places I mentioned, read the Apostle Paul's life, and Proverbs, so that you too may be prepared, and not deceived.
GOD BLESS YOU.
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