Dysfunction=Junction

I would like to keep this blog writing short … and to the point.
I don't know. I can sure try. But there is so much to say.

I have seen this scenario play out more times than I wish to enumerate.  Whole families have fallen into this one huge rut . . . DYSFUNCTION.  The biggest downfall of it all, is that usually, the family members don't/can't see it. They are too busy conducting their affairs, their "family life", too busy with the cares of this world, jobs, etc. The problem lies, of course, in THE MIND. It is a host of mind=sets, attitudes and very bad habits. I have come to believe that in most cases, dysfunction is generational, i.e. genetic. As in "blood-line curses". Yeah.  Just like that. I said it.

CURSINGS AND WORDS A=FLYING

Let's start out with the greatest tell-tale sign:
Curses. As in  "word cursings".  This usually starts with the parents, who are just following suit the way that they were trained, saying stuff over their kids like, "You're so stupid. You can't do anything right. You won't amount to anything. You'll probably end up in jail before you're 18."  And ETC.  It gets worse. Siblings start in, saying all manner of evil and dark and negative things over each other, not thinking a thing of it, as if it's just OKAY. Later in life, when approached about this behavior, many times they justify it by saying, "We were only kidding, poking fun … why, can't you take a joke??"
SHEEEEESH.
Anybody want to exit this family now??

MEMBERS JUST AIN'T THERE FOR YA

Maybe you come from this type of family. Maybe you have gone through some kind of crisis, a real hard one, and your family's reaction?  "Man I can't believe you let that happen to you … I can't believe you let that person into your life … If it was me, that would have never happened to me … What? You expect me to sympathize and coddle you? Suck it up, baby!"  That's just an example. Some of you have heard much worse. You have become the "family scape-goat", and you get blamed for ALL.
It doesn't matter what happens to anyone else … especially if you are the "lone christian" in the family.  "Just sit over there in the corner and DON'T TALK … we don't want to hear from you!"  Now Jesus said that he didn't come to bring peace but a sword … but he was talking about HIMSELF being the main burning & dividing ISSUE of Life. Jesus doesn't have to bring a sword to these families, they have already fashioned their own!
"Why, do you think you are better than us??? Are you a holier-than-thou person??? Why do you have to be so DIFFERENT???"  And if you are a TRUE BELIEVER, just trying to reach out to your family with the real love of God, well, watch out. In a dysfunctional family, this truth rings true more than anywhere else:
"A prophet is not welcome in his home town."
They just aren't listening.
So, don't plan on going through any personal crises, because even though they may "act" like they care, they won't. They won't be there for you.

WHERE IS THE LOVE?

Paul the Apostle warned that some would fall away from the faith, and some would let their love "grow cold".  So, if you see a hardened heart, and try to appeal to them to "soften up", good luck. The only way that is going to happen is if they have a
Damascus Road=type experience and Jesus bursts through their darkness and stubborn minds. It could happen. You could pray for it. But don't hold your breath, know when to pack-up and dust your feet off. The Lord has plenty of others in this world for you to reach, and you shouldn't spend your whole entire life going back & forth to family, just to repeatedly get your daily dose of light-socket treatment. One can only take so much "shocking". Trust me on this. You can learn to love from a distance … and God didn't call you to pain and strife and suffering. No he didn't.

DYSFUNCTION=JUNCTION, WHAT'S YOUR FUNCTION??

The "function" of dysfunction is to set everything in a family at odds with itself, for things to get twisted and not operate according to God's design. Some people have it all topsy-turvy, and for them it's "normal".  If you don't like it, then "tough!"
When you are a part of something dark like this, for so long, after a while you'll start to wonder if you slipped into  The Munsters  or  The Addams Family!
Unfortunately, we see dysfunction in many other settings … on the job in companies, in government etc.  Dating relationships.
Marriages. A man at the local Circle K yelling at his daughter while she is trying to decide which drink she wants from the fountain. A parent berating a child, who has long grown up, and has "gone his/her own way" and that same parent ridiculing that child/grown-up in public, in their presence or behind their back.  The major dynamic in dysfunctional families is the role-playing of the diplomat, the aloof Dad, the overbearing mother, the "parenting sister" and the family "secret" or the family scape=goat. There are other scenarios, this is just one example. What is the end goal?? That this plays out everyday of the year, for years, until it is passed down as the "family way" or tradition, and the whole thing just starts over again … unless someone rises up and BREAKS THE CHAINS.

THEY GOT TO PUT AWAY THE MASKS!

In order for this madness to stop, to change, those who are "responsible" must wake up and take off the masks. Stop pretending that everything is normal or okay. It's not. Someone is going to get hurt, and chances are, it is too late. They are already VERY HURT. If they love Jesus, then they can get help, they can get therapy.
But what about you???
Are you causing someone pain?
Do you act like a "weapon" because you were "trained" that way? True families are supposed to be there for each other, to share the load, to cry together, rejoice together and cheer each other on. Get rid of your stupid jealousy and hate. Stop pretending that you have such a great family, you've got the whole public fooled, but it all falls apart the next day you get back home. Take off the dark shades, take off the masks and get real … get the Love of God in your hearts. Stop persecuting your own flesh and blood … get behind them, and support their successes, or their attempts at that. Act like you care … and really do care!! Do something to show your love, and not just a bunch of words. Words mean nothing if they are not backed up with real genuine "I feel ya" LOVE.   Love is often an ACTION VERB, that manifests itself in awesome life-changing ways.
The MIRROR is pointing at YOU … take a good long stare at it,
and make a change in your life. For the good of someone you should love.